Today I turn 20 years old. Wow… What did I ever do to deserve 20 years of life on this earth? Twenty is a big deal. It’s bigger than 16, 19, or even 21. Twenty is not just an age, it’s not just another year of my life: twenty is the start of a new decade for me. I don’t know about you, but I get excited about a fresh start, a clean slate, a new life, a second chance. 

I was born. I loved the first decade of my life and then I turned ten. When I turned ten, things changed for me. I was old enough to be responsible for myself. I could brush my own teeth, tie my shoes by myeslf, answer the phone, and reach the sink to wash the dishes without stitting on the counter. 10 was a new start; I was no longer a little kid anymore. The second decade was where I grew up, developed my mind, and learned how to live life. The first ten years of my life were a good decade, and the second… Well, let’s just say that I have reasons for loving the thought of a new start. 

We all make mistakes, we all slip and fall, but I have the opportunity of a new decade; a new life. What was accomplished in the second decade has prepared me for this third one. In this decade I hope to get steady writing jobs, or a full time position of some kind in consulting, editing, or content creation. I would like to begin a YouTube channel to further my realm of influence and hopefully point a few people to Christ. I want to be a better witness than I was, a better person than I was. A new start is only a fresh start, and it can only succeed if you have goals set for yourself.

With God’s help, this third decade will be the best decade yet. Though, to be honest, I’m terrified of it. The third decade of my life is impending mistakes, garuanteed failure, long hours, hard work, and i just wanna live out a legacy that will last. I don’t want to leave the legacy of the second decade: a confused, stupid, insecure, anger-driven teenage boy who hid his feelings behind spite and sarcasm. I don’t want to be that kid anymore. I just want to be real.

More than anything, I’m hoping, though hope without prayer is like water without a boat: you may be able to travel, but it will be hard, and the longer you remain still, the more chance you have of going under. I’m praying that God will mold me into the man I should be; that he will use this third decade of my life to live out His story and make a difference for eternity.

Looking forward in fear mingled with an odd sense of excitement for what lies ahead…

As always, thanks for reading.

the anonymous novelist 

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