What To Do About Dating

  
As seems to be the trending theme of this blog, we return with yet another blog post inspired by something I saw on Instagram. I believe this is the third time something like this has happened, and this time inspiration came from Olivia Collingsworth. So, if this post is terrible, blame her. I’m totally kidding, thanks Olivia for the ideas.

INTRODUCTION:

Now, if you read the quote in the picture, you see a God-centered dating philosophy. It’s all about making Christ your One Love until He places the right person into your life. Me, I love jumping into things, I love tackling problems and quickly getting them out of the way. That’s not how God works. God is the Master Artist painting the picture of your life. If The Artist were to rush through the painting making quick, short strokes just to get it done, it would not be as beautiful or as good a likeness of you as He could create if He took the time to really work on it. 

If there is one thing I have learned–and there may only be one thing that I have learned–, it is to wait on God in everything. Zechariah 6:15 says:

…And this shall come to pass, if ye will diligently obey the voice of the LORD your God.

Now, obviously I’m pulling this slightly out of context, but its message for the Israelites is the same message for us today: whatever we desire, whatever we long for with all our hearts, it shall come to pass if we diligently obey the voice of the Lord our God.

WHAT I DON’T LIKE ABOUT DATING:

Not that I’ve had any experience with dating, but I don’t like the concept very much, and for good reasons. One of these reasons is that dating violates the command of God that says we are to treat each other like brothers and sisters in Christ. 

Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren;  The elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity. 

-1 Timothy 5:1-2

How can I treat a young lady like my sister if I am becoming physically intimate with her before marriage? Of course, these dating principals will only apply to Christians, which is strange because dating is not a Christian thing; it never was. I heard a man once say: 

Dating belongs to the world, they created it and we’re trying to clean it up with a few Bible verses.

That’s the truth. The whole concept of dating is to get to know someone to see if they are the right one for you. But, you’re not even supposed to be in that kind of a relationship until you know, or at least very strongly believe that the person is the right one for you. I don’t believe that the steps toward marriage should be taken so lightly. There should be a desire and moving from God before a young man takes steps toward getting to know a young woman.

Marriage between a man and a woman is a picture of Christ and His love for the church. It is holy and pure, we need to start treating it as such. Also, there seems to be little or no accountability in dating. To God we are ultimately accountable for how we live and the lives we influence and effect, but dating exists outside of that accountability for most people.

MY ADVICE:

The best advice I could give to a single person is to wait, and to wait on God. Pursue Christ and fall in love with Him, He will keep your heart safe until the time is right. Don’t risk getting hurt or scarred emotionally by following your heart. Trust God.

Both of my older siblings trusted God with their hearts and are both now happily married. God is two for two in my family, and those are pretty good odds. If He hasn’t failed yet, I have no reason to believe that He will now. 

Go to sleep like Adam. Meaning, forget about it, concentrate on serving God till He wakes you up to the person he’d have for you. I know that illustration doesn’t so well for young ladies, but it does work both way, I just didnt have an example of a young woman going to sleep. 

The truth is, if a man and woman would save their first love for each other, it would create a super strong bond between them.

TO THE GUYS:

I’m closing it out with these next few thoughts. Guys: by ready to marry when you begin seeking your bride. If you are sleeping, waiting on God, you have nothing to worry about. And if you wake up and you’re not ready to get married, emotionally, spiritually, financially, it was not God who woke you up, go back to sleep.

TO THE GALS:

Sorry for the southern expression ladies, but it just went so well with “Guys”… 

I encourage you to walk by faith, not by sight like it says in 2 Corinthians 5:7. Wait on the Lord. In the Bible, waiting is always active, not passive. Waiting is something you do actively, so it doesn’t mean hide in a closet until God brings Mr. Right into your life, it means go out and do things while you wait. God knows your address and He won’t lose it, He’ll bring your love to you.

CLOSING:

Forget dating, walk with God. Go to sleep and wait on God to wake you up, in the end it will all be worth it. And don’t think I’m not taking this crazy, roller coaster ride right beside you, because I am. We’re in this together as brothers and sisters in Christ. I just want to encourage you, the closer you get to God, the closer you’ll be to the one He has for you.

As always, thanks for reading, like, follow, share your thoughts with me. Oh, and look up Olivia Collingsworth on TwitterInstagram, and Facebook; you already know where to find me.

the anonymous novelist

Posted in My Life, Worldview and tagged , , , , , , , , , .

2 Comments

  1. Interesting article. I would throw out there something to ponder.

    1) dating itself is not inherently wrong.
    2) you can date without physical intimacy. Whether or not there is PT is not dependent on whether you are dating or not.
    3) getting to know your future spouse is actually a good thing. It creates a sense of non-dependency and learning to know what will in fact worth for you. You are the individual marrying, not your parents, not your friends, not your family. This decision is what YOU will have to live with.
    4) interesting analogy, yet flawed. There are plenty of young men who are Godly yet old because they were not watching for the person that would work for them. You have to be pursuing treasure in order to find it. Ruby’s won’t fall into your lap; you have to dig for them.
    5) Just as a piece of advice, leave subjects that you don’t have experience in to those who do. It’s hard to have wisdom on a subject without experience.
    6) There is no cookie cutter for life. Some people it may work to not date, (aka your family) other people come from different backgrounds and families.

    7) dating does in fact work; and without PT. I am in fact married now and saved my first kiss for marriage: no Major PT.

    Just some thoughts.. 😉

    • Hey Jerry. First off, awesome, awesome feedback. This is just what I’ve been looking for in my readers. It helps me to clarify my points when people take the time to explain their opinions and views. So, thanks.

      Secondly, there is so much to answer to in those 7 points that I’m actually devoting my next post to the answering most of them. Say tuned, I hope it answers some of your questions.

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